titles

::credits::

All songs including words and music were written by VJ Manzo except:

‘light of my life’ music by Chris Manzo and VJ Manzo & ‘crashing’ – ‘Keeper of My Heart’ words by Kristen Lima

‘4a’ verse inspired by Gabriel Fauré / ‘allusions to grandeur’ bridge inspired by Anton Dvorak

CD Art: Concept by VJ and Fred

Design& Prep: Fred - Fotographics

All songs written, arranged and performed by Clear Blue. Produced by Clear Blue. Engineered by VJ Manzo and Jeff Corneilson.

::images::

- DOWNLOAD the album art work in a single .PDF file

::lyrics::

1. exordium

2. lest I disown you

3. 4a

4. evensong

5. light of my life

6. sometimes I wonder

7. vinegar

8. midnight sky

9. crashing

10. who you are

11. into your garden

12. allusions to grandeur

13. complexity kills

14. fade away

1. exordium - Take all I am All I have All I know One life I have (and) what I’ve won is not my own / (For) I’ve got a past full of pain and mistakes all I’ve sown is a garden of weeds You’ve seen the worst that I’ve done And you’ve opened your arms And you’ve run after me / You light my sky A future bright With more to learn The past fades away To shades of gray And will not return / Open the doors Let the clouds disappear in the sky ‘til the brightness remains show me the way that you want me to go and I’ll go if there’s one thing I know / No I won’t fold I won’t fall I am sure I won’t lose sight Of the way I must go Let me feel your love tonight Let me know your love tonight Let me see your love tonight / And my cares can disappear For my hope has been restored All I’ve lost along these years Will return of this I’m sure And in all the tears I’ve sown I will see my dreams fulfilled For my life is not my own But according to your will Then for all I am to do Let me never walk away Let me see from eagle’s view

2. lest I disown you - Grounded high evermore Heaven behold me I’ve no cry unassured Heaven has calmed me now Into the light Time won’t define me / Shallow highs come before Emptiness leaves me Shall I rise to the floor Heaviness held me down You set me free Time can’t confine me / And when I wait when I wait I can see then I know Why should I fear Should I doubt I believe / Guard my heart evermore Lest I disown you Keep me safe from myself If logic dissolves you here Let you be real Sometimes reason disarms me / And after all my life Help me to be who you want me to be And in all my time Don’t let me fall from the heights that I’ve come

3. 4a - Grant me life eternal Grant me peace forever Set me free and always let your Light shine before me / Grant me life eternal Let me dream forever Keep me and in all things know I Love you forever / Guide my heart before you Light my path toward you Let your words be spoken and may Hope reign forever / Into your light That turns away the night Let it be so Let it be so / Forever more I believe I could live I could love forevermore

4. evensong - I stand before the chasm This night I try to fathom In dreams the waves are pounding I leave the dark surrounding I hold the sky from falling I hear the deep is calling Outside my hands are shaking Inside the chance I’m taking / Inside the light that follows A bridge to guide A hope to find forever A light to guide / I hold the world before you In my despair ignore you I see the waves above me I watch the dark surround me I see the stars unfold you I watch the sun behold you I hold my hands before you No more will I deplore you

5. light of my life - Draw me nearer more to you take me closer For all I have I found in you my entirety / my contentment I was searching My protection I was lost / Light of my life Guide in my night Hope of my hope The light of my life In infinite time We’ll laugh at the night Sight of my sight The light of my life / All my faults like grains of sand Dark obscured me Like a wandering soul in a dismal land How you saved me / I was nowhere Yet you found me Keep beside me Still I wander / Stay beside me Still I wander

Keep me near you Make it calm

6. sometimes I wonder - I wait and I wonder where am I when it's out there is it over / why for-swear what you could never see to gain a broken world inside a mystery oh / keep your heart and keep your world at peace and never trade these things for what comes easy oh / some-times I wonder: "Why come back to a world so full of catastrophe / only love can make you only love can break you only love can show you somewhere else then take you nothing in this world could ever keep me what is never bought is never sold sometimes I wonder sometimes I wonder

7. vinegar - Night taking time Light faking rhyme Love hold my hope to the Light of the sun / Skies turning ‘round Lies burning down Love still remains in my Heart I will hold on / and I love you still I love you I will love you Will you never let me go

8. midnight sky - Echoes and dreams Whispers and wonderings Simple beliefs Echoes and gleams, dreams Sparkling seas Lights unrelenting Feelings of peace Whispers and wonderings / Under a midnight sky opened wide Hailing a union drawn to the sky Any who've gone before reunite Dawning a day no more do we cry / Silently first Moving through mystery Followed by ease Followed by peace Never alone Covered by breakers Rushes of light Charges of closure

9. crashing - Heart cries Blare out Your eyes Stare down My life Tears down Your light never wears down / Can you feel the flame? Do you know the score Can you hear the song Do you feel the war / Hope shines Feel safe But in dark times Light fades Lies come Doubt stays Truth cries: only God saves / And all your waves are crashing And hitting the shore And all your ways and all your ways are and all your ways are

Keeper of my heart my Lord my God The one who put the dream inside my soul keeper of my heart my Lord my God / the dream inside my soul the dream inside my soul Come breathe again

10. who you are - In places no one else will go There you are And in the silence of the night There you are And when I walk from where I fell there you are And when I wake up in my hell There you are / I want to know who you are I want to know who you are and your name I want to feel who you are I want to know your name / I want to live the way you are So here I am I want to walk the way with you So take my hand And in the prayers that no one hears There you are And while I’m drowning in my tears There you are

11. into your garden - Speak to me clearly Comfort me with words I’ve never known Night shows no ending No ending for a soul without a home Take my surrender Show me what is real from what is known Night holds a secret A secret to a world I’ll never show / Come to me now I can hear your voice call like it’s haunting me Come to me now (I can see the stars light up my night) / Into your garden I’ll run I belong here Out of the night comes the sun Into your garden I’ll hide I belong here Taking me next to your side I belong here, I belong here I belong here, I belong here / Standing here waiting Captured by the wonder of it all Followed by a mystery A place behind a world I’d never know

12. allusions to grandeur - Take all I have And I’ll I’ve ever know In all I am And show me where to go / Open up the sky Let me see the sun Answer me the why Let me be the one Inside my heart I’ve everything to do I call your name And pray it gets me through / Dare we say On we go Do as we ought to do / Live we may Fail we know Find what we’re born to do / Turn away All regret Dream as they’ve feared to do See what nobody knew See as we’re made to do Lose we may On we go Stand where our fathers stood See as our father would Love like our brother should / And on we go until that day when time is stilled and stripped away from all / turn away the night answer to the call hidden in the light prominent to all

13. complexity kills - My night upon night flares with visions of all but I'm tied to what's here so how can I reach you / Don't simplify heaven then say it's the cure and slow not my mind if I've not the heart yet / complexity kills me when I lose my guide but strengthens my heart when I finally see it / inside of me intensity my symphony of saddened melodies I'm desperate inadequate for what I see burning here inside of me / Though in my eyes I am blind to your work In my mind I'm consumed with my own dare I know what you do in your time lest I see all is done in its time ever more / so let me be in every way and set me free with every day and let me see simplicity the beauty in catastrophe / in side the walls of entropy between the lines of clarity the random bond of things to come the rank design of things you've done

14. Fade Away - Fade away Every divertissement And separate from me every anxiety in all that lies ahead of me inside my destiny / fade away any who interfere and separate from them all hope that destiny is found in their duplicity and be it violently / In all that lies in my heart Be it far from me to sentence the arcane without a cause / Oh Let me cross without falling below / Abstract fixtures Keep me aligned Won’t you keep those running after me away from me I cry / I fade away all my Dark secret vengeances as I abate don’t forget what I’ve prayed be it so /so in my heart set me free and let justice be served be it known all who live be it known all below / lo your day of reckoning has begun they’ll be no one to save you endless regret for all that you’ve done seeds that you’ve sown repay you / anchor my life from all that may haunt keep me myself from reaping guard me against my fondness to vaunt vanity leads to weeping / keep me ever closer guide me as I walk through worlds of dark and shadows help me let my darkness fade away

::comment::

Today is September 15th, 2005. Everything written below was written way too long ago. You see, we've been working on this album for a long time. The dates below will give you an idea of the production, but it doesn't even matter because everything has changed several times over.

We actually began recording in January 2005--way after our originally scheduled date. There were problems with getting computers to work and getting equipment and all of this stuff. We used the MOTU HD192's in our studio running on a ghetto-fabulous computer with a senior-citizen hamster inside running on a treadmill to keep the processor running. We recorded 4 songs without vocals and then we stopped because I had to finish my last semester of college.

In April, our band line-up changed and in May, we purchased a new drum set and we upgraded our computer to one with a slightly yunger hamster on a treadmill. We decided that with the new drum set, it'd be best to rerecord everything. This was a wise choice since we also devised a good way of tracking that works for us. We worked nearly every day from May-August on the album. We have lots of tracks, but selected 14 that we feel are the most cohesive. The other tracks will be recorded at a later time. I even made 2 small corrections to our master disc on the day I sent it in to be pressed. I also, next day air-ed them another CD master with an even smaller correction the day after they received our stuff. That was this morning.

There were tons of bad events that transpired besides our line-up change and our crappy computer and the flood that took place in our studio in August when a sewer main broke which forced us to operate while standing in sewage for a few days before relocating to my basement. All of these things make the title of our album much more meaningful and appropriate.

We scrapped the artwork (described below) we originally were planning and came up with a new scheme. You may now read the information below with a full understanding of the events that have transpired in chronological order.

~VJ Manzo Sept. 15, 2005

Clear Blue III

After a productive summer of writing/learning new songs, weddings, touring and, practicing, Clear Blue decided to take some time off from touring to focus on the creation of the next Clear Blue album(s).

The prep

Comment written October 2004:

Since April 2004, plans were being worked out to finish the creation of our recording studio—partnered with COHIC [still unnamed at this point]. The plans included the purchase of a high-powered computer, a Soundkraft 48 Channel Board, and the MOTU HD192 Core System with 2 Expanders, and two recording snakes.

I just can’t bear to record our new material in my bedroom again. I don’t think convincing me is possible at this point. We're not going into a pro studio to pay for this thing either--I have too many time-consuming ideas and I'm not paying for that. So we’ve decided to wait for the studio to be completed. It is now October, and the equipment is on its way. All of this, April thru October, has been preceded by near-daily phone calls, e-mails, and text messages between Jeff, our sound tech, and myself saying “Oh my God—I can’t wait ‘til we record” and “I’ve got all the arrangements worked out in my head and on paper” and “Only ‘X’ days until we get the stuff”.

Comment written November 20, 2004:

Yesterday, the rest of our gear came in (after a long heated battle) and Jeff and I finished running two 150' recording snakes from our stage to the board and from the board to our control room. It was a bit hexing since we had to run it through the ceiling and drill through a couple walls. As of today (Saturday) we are ready to record. We will officially begin on Tuesday.

The title

I decided sometime early in 2004 that we should call the third cb album “the ill-made night”; a spin off of “The Ill-made Knight”, the third book in T.H. White’s “The Once and Future King”. What does it mean? “The ill-made night”: the night being the time of our performance—at home, on stage at rehearsal. All of the practicing, the struggles we go through (with each other or just in general) and every aspect of our lives that is less desirable and/or difficult—all of this plays an integral part in achieving what we know and experience during “the night”—the time when you just pour it all out. Without the death in ourselves that is caused by these factors, there could be no life produced in other people through us—through our music. It is in this ill process that what we have chosen to be and do has been made.

The album cover

Comment written November 6, 2004:

"A few weeks ago, I sent the boys some digital artwork I created that we could possibly use for an album cover. They didn't flip for it, so I prayed about it and one morning, after my shower, before I went to school, I decided to go find a nice painting that I liked and see if there was any way that we (the band) could pose like the characters in the painting. I thought 'Wow, what a cool idea'. I don't know any bands that come to mind who've done that (I'm sure someone has). In any case, the first few paintings I thought of wouldn't work right (in my opinion) unless one of us posed nude. Shortly thereafter it hit me and it's the one I pitched to the guys in the band: the 1877 painting "Paris Street, A Rainy Day" by Gustave Caillebotte.

Now, flying to that street in Paris is not exactly in our budget at this point. Besides, our U.S. sales could plummet if we went to France to take a picture at this point in history. In any case, NYC seemed right for the pose. I originally thought we'd shoot in Time Square because the street forks into 2 streets like in the painting, but our photographer Marisa suggested the "Flatiron Building".

I wanted to go early in the morning so that we didn't have a lot of people around, so we planned to be there at 6:30 (sunrise). None of us got much sleep the night before--Chris and Steve just stayed awake. We were up at 4 (except JP whom I called and woke up as we were leaving to go to the train). So there we were in 40° temperatures with NYC winds bouncing off of the buildings around us. In any case, we were done shooting by 8:30, so some of us did something that we hadn't done in a long while: McDonald's breakfast. We were back at our homes by 9:15, and , at 10, I was in bed sleeping 'til 2:30 (when I woke up and decided to write this blurb).

The process

Before the studio process started, and is it was with the first album, I feared that something terrible would happen and the songs would never make it to the studio or the entire project would be horribly delayed. Daily, I reminded myself that these were lies and this everything will turn out divine.